I spoke with Aya this morning who I know through Charles and Patsy’s online community NAAS. There are many powerful groups that meeting through that platform on Zoom. One that Aya helps facilitate is a Cacao and Coffee Creative Writing Circle. It is on Tuesday evenings, and I would like to attend one. The next one is scheduled for June 10th. I am also planning to do some personal work with Aya about my own healing related to my professional work as a doctor, and also the work that I want to be doing through my house as a community steward. I would love to host a community writing workshop or “retreat”.

What would come from a creative writing retreat? What do I need to feel better in my gut, in my mind and in my body? I am going over to Solara’s soon for the graduation party. Do I have an intention? To connect and to be present. I would like to share about the project of my house. What is the 30 second speech?

Why is my house called a healing center? I am focused on my own healing. It can be a deep process as I am connected to a system of deep suffering. When I am at the clinic I am with people who have very difficult lives and it is hard for me to integrate that without shutting part of myself down. I have become collapsed in certain ways, and I would like to use the home space to help reintegrate myself. I present myself a needy person, one who has something to offer by sharing my story with those who have the capacity to hear.

I am interested in creativity and performing. I went to an open mic Cabaret last Sunday, and I was inspired by the invitation to take the stage for 7 minutes. For an artist to create a story, an experience for an audience to witness. For an audience to be invited into the world of the creative spirit.

I am reading Rick Rubin’s book on creativity, and there is something powerful to me that speaks to processing our history, warts and all, including trauma, through artistic mechanisms that put our stories before an audience. I am doing that with this writing.

And I could get on stage to read a piece composed with an intention for a space. It could be a prompt for further reflection. What is needed to support and sustain community? Is stewarding community a new or ongoing role for me? I feel I have been somewhat dormant in areas where I have also previously been quite active.

This afternoon I am going to a “Permaculture Party” that is inviting a broad community to be together on a property, to work in the garden, to potluck, to play music and dance and enjoy the company and the space. This is something that could happen on my property as well, the land and the house at 3261 Quail Ave. I use the address to describe in plain terms what it is. It is a property of land with a house. There are so many words which could be used to frame what it is trying to be, and it can be helpful to keep it open too. I would like to have meals and music and conversation at the house. A bonfire creates a nice way to be in the yard together. At this point, there is a lot of neglect happening with the yard. I don’t think think I am going to fortify my resources before inviting people in, I think I am going to invite people in to whatever this is and develop it together.

I could have a roommate soon who helps me to develop this space. Or that may be a long way off, I don’t yet know.

On Sunday, I am hoping to visit the Minnesota Ecovillage. They have a nice website and have written about their intentions and manage several communication threads including a FB page and a Signal thread to share updates. (https://minnesotaecovillage.org)  It is an inspiring example of how to invite people in to a collaborative process. That project is more developed in some ways than this one, but there is no reason that the Creative Healing Retreat Center can’t be humming with good energy too.

On Tuesday, I am planning to go to the Rough Cuts performance on Augsburg’s campus. I like connecting with the community of performing artists and script writers who bring new works to audiences. Next Monday is Leslie’s Cabaret Open Gym. I don’t feel that I have anything to share this time, but I am inclined to go.

On June 14th is the Halfway to Harmony gathering at the Organic Compound which is always a beautiful community event. (https://www.organiccompound.org) On June 21 and 22nd Ahlay Blakely will be in town and leading song circles at New City Center which feels important to the process I am in with my Creative Healing Center. (https://www.eventcreate.com/e/minneapolis21)

There is a cultural healing center in South Minneapolis doing many wonderful things called Anam Cara. They don’t have all their events on the website, but it is a good overview of what they do: https://caralcarlson.com

Hello, I would like to share a story with you about performing arts and healing. When I was in high school, it was a big deal when I overcame my self-consciousness about singing to try out for the show choir as a Junior. When I made that varsity group as a senior, that felt like I was arriving to a new social world. Then I went to college and focused on earning good grades so I could get into medical school.

Our medical system is flawed. I feel ill from my participation in it. And I’m standing here at an open mic rather than at a therapist’s office because of my grandiosity. I think this problem is bigger than me, and that I am a symptom, not the cause of the illness. That is a bold thing to think and say. What is the problem, and what can we do about it? Can I explain in 5 minutes?

I don’t think everyone has to be a performer, but I started reading Rick Rubin’s book “The Creative Act: A Way of Being” and I believe that the energies of the universe move through us and what we choose to express means something. There is creativity to finding an audience, and a creative process around finding resonance.

Sometimes, healing is blocked because the environment is wrong. It’s too much of the same patterns repeating themselves again and again. Going on vacation, to a retreat center or even a friend’s house can represent and opportunity for reset. What I’d like to do is reset myself and reorient towards a position facilitating a guest house for creative healing processes.

It is a Creative Healing Institute. And I am just in the brainstorming stages, but I write about the process on WordPress, and I am talking about it today. On Tuesday I am going to host a potluck and I want to welcome people who are interested in this project I’m describing, and maybe over the next few months, identify people who would like to be involved and who may even live here with me.

I will open up applications for people to suggest a creative healing project that they would like to work on at the house. Something is out of order. I get energy from imagining these steps in the future, when in reality there are obstructions right in front of me that I’m not dealing with very well. The dishes in the sink, ain’t going to do themselves. The yard is not being well-maintained. I am a human who has a story that I am failing. I am failing at home ownership. I am failing at healing medical clients through my work as a physician. I am failing to address my own healing. Until I put the words on a page. It is a step. It is a prelude to the first step. It is describing the situation now. And I am not afraid of the situation right now, but I do need to be clear about where we are so that I can move forward. 

Thanks for listening.

Hello my friends! I would like to invite you to a potluck dinner on Tuesday night, and I would like to share with attendees about my vision for this house as a Creative Healing Center. We will have a conversation about what real health is, and what it looks like to practice that. I will be sharing about my own processes, including reading the book The Creative Act: A Way of Being by Rick Rubin. It is a kind of guidebook for a creative life. A life with the energies flowing. Source energy flowing through us, and our creative projects at the Creative Healing Institute. Come and make art. Come and eat and talk with other humans about what it means to live “The Good Life”.

I named my clinic in 2019 as part of Powderhorn Shark Tank. I didn’t win any prize money, but I made a big poster and gave a little speech at the community center about my vision. And I just wanted to promote natural health. I wanted to teach about nutrition and exercise, and to demonstrate and support that. I wanted to focus on mindfulness and social connection. Being part of a framework of community. And I have gotten away from that and worked for the last 5 years at a community health clinic. We prescribe drugs and fill out paperwork. We complete charts and bill the insurance companies. It is a complicated pyramid of work, and what doctors do makes it very difficult to address the root causes of healing like I would like to. So instead, I would like to create that healing environment in my home, for myself and for guests and visitors.

So if you are free on Tuesday night, come to the potluck for this conversation. It will be informal, but basically we will eat ~6 and have music ~8 with conversation in between about creativity and health. What kind of workshops or retreats would people like to see here? What kind of contributions would you enjoy making to the space? Maybe you want to offer a sound bath or concert? Maybe you want to come and work in the gardens or come for a bonfire?

I am having one of those tonight (Saturday) and if you want to come, send me a message on Signal.

Otherwise, if you want to come on Tuesday to the potluck, it will be about six to nine. 

Thanks for reading. There will be more in-person events ahead.

There is a Facebook group for Intentional Communities in Minneapolis, and though I haven’t posted there, I have wondered what my message for that group would be if I wanted to communicate about my vision. Here’s what I came up with last night:

I have been in Minneapolis since 2016. In 2022, I bought a house in Golden Valley with grand ambitions for a community house. Initially it was 5 of us living together, 3 adults and 2 kiddos. Since then, there have been a few other visitors and residents, but I have also been spending a fair bit of time here on my own in a kind of community house failure.

It’s given me space to daydream and imagine. I want to do something a bit different than how others have done this. This house has a kind of mission, which I am only just starting to understand. It is a guest house for theater. There is a living room rehearsal space for music and storytelling. There are mostly guest rooms, with only a couple rooms for the house managers to live. There are frequent, if not daily activities at the house for friends and guests.

We cook and eat together, and the food is grown in the garden and comes from local sources close to the earth. We drink clean water and avoid products that are designed to cause harm. We are aligned with music and harmony of the universe.

The house is still in the womb so to speak. Or it’s been neglected. It is too much house for me to manage on my own. I didn’t move here to have a retreat from the world, but that is what it has become, and I’m ready to invite others to join me.

So, if there is something intriguing about my vision, feel free to reach out and I will plan to have a house meeting for folks who would like to be involved in the creation of this Residential Healing Center. It will be a site for retreats and healing workshops. It might be relevant that I work as a Medical Doctor, and what I would most like to do is to show people about healthy living by inviting them to come stay at my home as a “high touch” AirB&B. Do you understand what I’m describing? A home that invites guests to go on a deep healing journey. Who would like to be part of that? Who wants to help?

On the last post I imagined a “Healing Space” group and I was asking for support. On the post before that I imagined a cycle of Mind-Body Skills Groups. This writing is a kind of working space, and it is evolving. Things don’t come out the way they started. Just brainstorming tonight, and will make more posts in the future when it comes in more clearly.

I would like to bring people together for in-person cooking classes. And to play music. Simple ingredients for a good time, music and food. I would also like to talk about things on the internet. On the blog, or maybe on Youtube or Twitter. Hmmm.

It may be that the Good Life Clinic needs a board. Who wants to be on the advisory board for my holistic health project? Bringing people together for the good stuff. 

What is going on on Mondays? On Wednesdays? Maybe I am not yet ready for a committed regular project. But if I were, I would want to host things where experts share things. (I check my phone.)

Wow. Amanda is leading a song class tomorrow from 12-2. Holy shit I wanna go. $29. Worth it. I met her on the West Coast while traveling and she is a songwriting Momma.

I had opened my phone to look for the dates for an event that’s already planned in Minnesota that seems to overlap so much with what I am aiming to do. And in checking my FB events, I found Amanda’s event which I had almost missed.

What I was looking for was that Offers and Needs Market on the 22nd that Slow is hosting. I just made a calendar so I don’t miss things. Recently I did not attend many events. But that is changing.

Hello. Thank you for clicking the link and taking a few moments to read this message. I am looking for a partner, or partners who can hold space in a loving way for my healing process. I am working with an IFS therapist, and I intend to work with others who can help me on my recovery journey. I am not an alcoholic, but I do have significant mental health challenges that I hope can improve in the context of loving support from a community that chooses to invest some amount of their time and attention on me and my healing story. So thanks again for being here.

In Feb 2022, I bought a four-bedroom home on Quail Ave N on behalf of a community of 5 who were excited to move in and live together. It was really a family of 4 that I was inviting to live with me. At the time, I had little insight or concern about some of the practical aspects of home maintenance, cleaning, and repairs. I was swept away by the excitement and the energy of being in this community that for me was represented in Community Heart Share circles on Thursday nights.

In March 2023, one of the members of our household had come to the decision that it was time to leave. The 4 of us continued together for the next few months, but later decided the time to make a change would be in the summer before the school year started. So by August 2023, I was in this 4 bedroom home alone. With a dog and a cat. Okay. I’m sorry if I’m getting too long-winded, but I think this helps to set the foundation for where we are going.

I enjoyed playing the piano more and being in the house alone. I had the idea to invite another friend in with their son, but it ultimately didn’t seem like it would work. So I continued in the house on my own through the winter. In April 2024, a couple who had moved to Mexico were back in town and they started staying with me on a short-term basis. It was great to have them in the house, and I invited them to stay longer. In the end, they stayed til Nov 2024 when the weather was getting cold and it was time to return to Mexico, and overall, it had worked pretty well for us.

Now I am still wondering about the vision for this house and how it can be used to serve its highest purpose as a community house. Even the phrase “community house” has so many meanings implied that might be different from what I am intending. I want to be well. And I want the house to be a reflection of my wellness and for it to support events that are nourishing to others. I am hoping for ripples of wealth (energetically) in the community.

On Thursday night I went to CHS at a new home. It was a reunion of sorts, and the people and the space were shining and there was an abundance of love and community care in the house. I wondered, how can I cultivate this kind of environment for people who visit me? I know that a lot of work is needed, and that I have stumbling blocks that lead me to cycles of frustration and inaction. How can I ask to be supported in my own healing and the healing of this space?

What I would like to do is develop relationships with individuals who would like to be supportive of me in this reclamation project. At one point I imagined hosting a weekly progress report meeting. Maybe it is a board meeting for the house? Maybe it is a council for me? And maybe it could serve others who are also working on healing themselves and their home spaces?

There will be limitations if we try to take on too much. In this group, I am asking to be at the center for my own healing. I need that kind of support, and my needs will dissolve into the background if others are coming in with more pressing needs than my own. I have heard “don’t outgrieve the griever”. Perhaps this is a grief group? I imagine and hope it will be a lot more practical than just airing grievances. But this writing may be doing part of that work too.

So what would it look like to have this group, or even for individuals to choose to communicate with me about these topics? Well, fortunately I do have space in my schedule for meetings and time to do the work. Mondays and Wednesdays are especially good for me.

So I could imagine chatting with you once a week, and possibly also have a group that meets once a week. I would share about what is going on at the house, what opportunities there are for improvements, what is stuck, what feels hopeless. And maybe we brainstorm and come up with ideas or plans to make improvements. 

I think if there is one person who would agree to come over and walk through the house with me and help organize the tasks that could be completed to help make the house shine. And some of these projects I have significant resistance to completing on my own. It can feel out of proportion and inexplicable. I am looking for folks who can be patient and supportive as I heal through the blocks that have made it so difficult for me at times.

I would like to have a weekly cooking class at the house. It would be a group of 2-5, and I’m looking to deputize a leader for each week to plan and organize the meal. We will cook and eat together and talk about food and ways to make it streamlined for ourselves to be well fed in a world where that can seem so complicated.

I may be inviting a housemate to live with me soon. It will be critical to me that they are understanding and supportive of my process of self healing and healing the space, and that they can be a collaborator in that. I am not prepared to be a landlord and to charge rent, or to host guests who can receive support from the house for their own creative projects yet, though I hope that that changes in time.

1. Do you appreciate reading this message and are you willing to communicate about this through texts? We can do that individually, or you can be added to a “Healing Spaces” group. 2. Would you be willing to talk on the phone (or Zoom) on a regular or intermittent basis about “Healing Spaces”? 3. Is there anything else you would like me to know about how you can support me on my healing journey?

I would like to be leading a weekly group on Mondays that is similar in format to other series I have hosted of Mind-Body Skills Groups. The last one I did was for the Sanity Project, and I will post a link to the description for that group in the comment below. This one will be different. But I think it will be a rolling group rather than a committed one. People can come and go to the container each week and we will make it work.

There are basically 8-12 weeks possible. I could repeat some of the lessons. But we will do drawings and shaking and dancing, talking with a symptom exercise, guided relaxations and imagery. We will work with soft belly breathing and meditation.

And everyone is invited to be on screen and to take part of the time for their check-in each week. Each person gets to speak when we do the exercises and I do my best to manage the time. It’s not perfect and that’s okay.

Where do I want to recruit from? I can share it with Community Visioning on Signal. I can invite Libby Boo and Marta. I don’t expect them. But they are invited. Who else? More of NAAS? What about MAHA? Who is MAHA? Is it people who respond to Monica’s post on FB? 

What about people who watch Suzanne Humphries’ videos? They have few views, but she knows what she is talking about.

What about Bridget? What would she want to teach at NorthPoint to pregnant mommas? She is a leader. She can lead classes at NorthPoint or at the Music Box. Joshua too. How can we generate income if they are bringing people in. And we can bill insurance. Someone knows how to do it. We can hire a biller and coder. I don’t know how to do all the parts. This is a big operation. It is a healing center. We can use insurance. What is the big MAHA vision? What does healing look like? It is at the house, and it is online on Zoom. We have dancers and singers and story tellers. We bring our big hearts and our authentic selves. We are loved by Master G, the Love Guru.

The Tea House continues. The MBSG resumes. It is happening.

What time? Let me know in the comments? 930am? 830? 1pm? 4pm?

The will go for 2 hours I think. The first one might be more of an info session. Can we start on 3/10/25? I think why not?

Hello, I am inviting you to help support me in changing my role in the health care system. You might know that I work as a medical doctor, and the reality is, that in 2024, I can not handle it for very much longer. There is an honor in showing up to that patient-doctor relationship. There is a part of me that still wants that model to work. And there are still plenty of people who are coming in, and they are dependent on that system. And even my very best efforts seem to miss the mark.

My personal health is not strong. I avoided receiving the COVID-19 shot, but I have picked up so much of the culture of the system over the years, and I have lost discipline to care for my own health. I don’t exactly know the way forward, but I want to invite others over to come together to discuss health topics. Let’s share our best health practices. I am the student. But I am a student with a big role to play in helping bridge with the system.

I am sick because of my connection to the system, and I am longing to speak freely about the problem of the vaccines. How we know they cause harm, and that the regulators know but they look the other way. Because they are just doing their jobs too to protect their paycheck. This whole world runs on paychecks. But within that world, there are those who run on love. And we can love each other and help each other to be well outside of the system. Like what Patch Adams was doing. And so I am looking to break free from the system, first with myself, and then with others. I can invite my classmates that I trained with in the future, and help them to break free too.

I am asking people to defect from the system. Because we are calling out the harms of the system, because the harms are real. People were really harmed by the COVID shots, and they have been harmed by the other vaccines for years. It’s the obvious truth that we need to be talking about. Not to convince or persuade, but to find the people who know so that we can work together effectively. Because things are moving fast, and what we know is important.

So let’s get together. Let’s make time to talk about our health practices and our health journeys together. It’s non-judgemental, non-hierarchical. I have a unique perspective, but I am a beginner with so far to go.

What is a good night? Monday? Tuesday? Wednesday?

Hello my friends, and thank you for reading this blog. I have a lot to say, but I haven’t had focused time to sit at the computer and write. I’ve got a few plates spinning, which is typical for me.

Later today, I will be driving to Little Falls, MN for an evening musical performance at the Great River Arts space with my friends Frances and Collin. On Tuesday I’ll be hosting an open mic at my house, and on Wednesday, I’m co-hosting a big event with my friend C-Star in the backyard. On Saturday the 17th I will be at the Organic Compound and I will be performing a short set there too.

I am spending most of September on the West Coast. More details will be coming about that trip on my Substack blog and social media.

In October, I am anticipating spending more time at home, hosting out-of-town guests for most of that time in a lead-up to the election on November 5th. We will be making music, telling stories, dancing, and recording and distributing online.

At the end of November I am planning a retreat in Duluth for the week after Thanksgiving. More details on that in the next post.

Thanks for reading. God bless!

-Leaf Waterbird

Hello! Thank you for clicking on the link and welcome to my WordPress blog page. I started this as a private blog while I was working as a medical resident back in 2018. During the pandemic, I revived it for a bit to share some of my controversial opinions as I wondered if I would have a future at all within the medical establishment system. So far, I continue to navigate as a licensed MD working in a low-income clinic and I have learned how to protect my own energy as I encounter overwhelming situations routinely through my daily work.

I have been an enthusiastic supporter of Robert F. Kennedy Jr’s Presidential campaign, and I appreciate the opportunity I have to support his political efforts as a slightly veiled confession of my controversial ideology. I read Substack articles by Toby Rogers and Meryl Nass and I read books by Peter McCullough, Suzanne Humphries, and Bobby Kennedy. I’ve listened to the Highwire and watched interviews on Children’s Health Defense. And I still work in a clinic that recommends COVID booster shots and the childhood CDC vaccine schedule.

Most of my patients are adults, and most of them do not have a primary doctor when they come to see me. They have been on chronic opioids prescribed by a doctor now retired, or they have been in the hospital with a mental health or physical health crisis. They have been on the streets or they have moved here recently from Central America, Mexico or African countries. It is interesting and meaningful to show and provide basic medical care for demographics where the needs are high.

The reason for this post is not about my work at the clinic. I am intending to put my name on the ballot as an independent (We The People) candidate for the Minnesota House of Representatives in district 43B. In order to qualify, I need to collect 500 signatures in less than 2 weeks, by June 4th at 5:00pm. I am building a team of volunteers and supporters to help me with this ambitious goal, and you are invited to be part of this effort.

I will use this page for updates and events. I intend to host at least 3 events before the deadline, and I will distribute signature-collection sheets to neighbors and volunteers who are willing to help reach this goal. With 10 volunteers, we each would need to collect 50 signatures. And if we can get 50 volunteers, then we could each get 10 signatures, maybe with as little as 1 hour of door-knocking. Does this math make sense to you? Leave a comment below or send a message through the contact tab if you would like to be involved.

Tentatively:

May 28th Potluck and Meet & Greet

May 30th Potluck and Strategy Coversation

June 1st Morning Door Knocking

June 3rd Final Signature Collection Rally

June 4th Petition Submission